Identity Crisis? Nah, This I Just Who I Am

I am Briauna Mariah Graeber.

That is who I am.

I will change, I will grow, but I will never be different.

I am that little girl walking to middle school who still practices multiplication and thinks about fairy stories and about the next time I get to do a sleep over. I am that shy Sophomore girl who wants a new start going to a new rigorous school program. I am that girl who wants to do really well in school. I am that girl who compares herself to those that she thinks do better than her. I am that girl that knows she can do better. I am that girl who falls hard for for that one, really great, crazy awesome guy that will never return the feelings. I am that girl studying bathymetry of Possession Sound with my classmates, who writes poems, who loves, who wonders. I am that girl who speculates about the fashion industry and thinks its “cool.”

I am like you. I am human. We change, we grow.

I was shy. I had few friends. I didn’t have opinions. I was sliding by. But now I want to make a statement. This is who I am.

Don’t listen when they say “never change,” because you can always be better. What they mean is, “don’t lose yourself.”

I will always be me.  Lately, “me” has had changing meanings. Its like there are two of me. The one who slides by is slipping away. It’s like metamorphosis. The second me is the one who will go out with a bang! The one that HAS opinions and that will stand up and YELL for no reason.

I am that girl who dances, listens to music. I am that girl who is obsessed with Lady Gaga and Coco Rocha and Alexander McQueen and runway. I am that girl who STUDIES ad campaigns, names, logos. I am that girl who is loud, with friends all over the world. I am that girl who is going to live in New York, Paris, London, Milan. I am that girl who thrives on the fashion industry. I am that girl who wonders, who writes poems, who loves. I am that girl who knows better than to fall hard for for that one, really great, crazy awesome guy that will never return the feelings. Because you know what? This is my life. My crazy, amazing, awesome life. And I don’t accept or need that any more. I am that girl who fears coming across vain to people that don’t know me. But I also accept my vanity. I love myself. I love my life.

I just walked for the national event, Rene Ropas Dollhouse Prom, last night. It was amazing.

My friend asked me how it was, what we did.

“Its exhausting actually. I sit around in a stuffy room with a bunch of models and action and everyone is running around and all the hair spray gives you a headache and we get hair and makeup done, run around a bit, do a run through of the runway which hurts your feet, then all the adrenaline hits you at the very end and we catwalk in front of a huge crowd with tons of energy. Then after, there’s a lot of music, dancing, and mingling. It’s awesome.”

I HAVE A STATEMENT TO MAKE! THIS IS ME.

Nice to meet you 🙂

Be Fierce!!

Briauna Mariah (:

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