I am no comedian, but I like to try to be funny sometimes. So here is me… well, I wouldn’t call it making fun of myself exactly… maybe I’m just “making fun.” Let me have my fun rant here for a minute, okay? Men, boys, guys, whatever you like to be called, you might enjoy this one the most.
First off, don’t go telling me being a fashion model is a piece of cake!! People think its about being pretty. Its not. It’s about being ugly. Seriously. Its about pushing the limits, its about being uncomfortable. It is pain and absurdity. It is Lady Gaga. It is amazing.
It has taken me time to get where I am as a model in terms of my confidence, comfort zone, and skill.
When I say comfort zone, I mean in the most literal sense: GETTING NAKED (see title). As a model, I have been soaked with freezing hose water in the middle of September at 8pm in Washington (that’s pretty cold, by the way), I have been poked in the eye with mascara sticks, I have scaled sloping rocky formations in 5 inch heels, I have had to hold difficult poses while the photographer figures out why the camera isn’t snapping, and, yes, I have stripped down in public on countless occasions, ALL FOR THE SAKE OF FASHION.
I have this running list of sorts of all the places I’ve gotten naked at to change wardrobe for a photoshoot. All places were pretty public, mind you (don’t worry though, I always find a nice little spot to hide while people are not around/looking). You’ll see, looking down the list, that the locations get more and more interesting. And a majority of them took place at the same darned park on different days.
- I have gotten naked in a car with tinted windows.
- I have gotten naked in a water tower.
- I have gotten naked in a handi-capped Honey Bucket.
- I have gotten naked in a forest. (Okay, it wasn’t a forest, it was that same park with lots of people around that day, but I was hiding in behind the trees and even had clothes hanging up on branches).
- I have gotten naked in a bookstore.
- I have gotten naked in the desert! (Alright, again, it wasn’t exactly a desert, it was Eastern Washington, but it was hot! There were few trees, there were lots of dry crags and high rocks and formations and little chipmunks. It counts as the desert to me.)
By far, the most amusing thing for me had to have been #6. The place was called Peshastin Pinnacles. There were few people there but it was a public place and there was little to hide behind. From where I was, I could see the highway not too far away, and there was a group of guys nearby exploring the area. It was a great place for hiking (if death is something you’re into), and an even greater place for an editorial. This was also the place I climbed steep and treacherous rocky and sandy (not a good combination) formations in my 5-inch Guess heels.
Where am I going with this? I don’t know.
But now I can say, I got naked in the desert! What!
Really though, modeling isn’t all glamor and bling. It’s hard work. As a model, I accept the fact that I am a blank canvas for the designer/photographer/agency/whoever-is-running the show. No if’s and’s or but’s about it. Which is fine by me. This is my life. I love every day of living this career, even if it means being in awkward, hard, scary, uncomfortable positions. That’s part of the adventure!
Pushing the limits is what I do.
Briauna Mariah (: